“Peace and Love” by Matthias Warlick and Jay Loren
It is difficult for us to imagine peace, love and rainbows in our current world situation. A kind and sustainable world seems like an impossibly distant dream. However, we all have the tools to make our communities a little kinder and more pleasant to be in through the avenue of de-escalation. Responding to conflict with a measured calmness that aims to recognize the humanity in each individual leads us down a path of friendship and camaraderie with even the most unlikely people.
Screaming and arguing when someone upsets you is a natural and sometimes appropriate response to distress. However, in the long run, almost no one is swayed from their position by an aggressive demonstration of facts, feelings, or opinions. Humans are naturally concerned with their own worldview, and must be gently teased into other options. Like when approaching a baby animal in need of help, one must pretend not to approach, but be a gentle and unthreatening part of the creature’s environment. No one wants to be told they are wrong,but everyone wants to feel like they are cared for and taken seriously.
So, sometimes ignoring our knee-jerk reactions and investigating why someone feels so scared, upset, threatened, or angry can be a practical step to end the violence. Other people generally don’t want to hurt someone who is meeting their needs. Those needs can be anything, from thirst, hunger, safety, or emotional validation. The lack of any of those things can make anyone volatile. Once you are in someone’s good graces and a valuable part of their life, it is much easier to convince someone that we want the same thing in the end; a peaceful and harmonious life.
While this is how we treat others, we must be able to take valid criticism and challenges to our own deeply held beliefs. None of us is born free of the societal ills that surround us. We will make mistakes, we will hurt people, that is unavoidable. What matters is what we do when confronted with our own transgressions. Will we rise to the occasion with dignity, or will we fall to base defensiveness?
If all took care of each other, all would enjoy a life of ease previously unheard of. We already have the technology, now we simply need to convince others it is possible. That is the heart of what we are trying to do with our art here at Rose Emporium: A Collective Art Gallery Against Tyranny. If you would like to know more about de-escalation techniques, here is a short and basic guide.